Oh, what a crazy week. I don’t know if this qualifies as a poem, or what you call it. Maybe an observation, maybe just a mindless rant. Many of the things I write come when they choose. I write the date if at all possible, so I can reflect on the specific time frame. I am not posting in a linear fashion, so take it all with a grain of salt.
I often ignore myself, change my tune, feel frazzled and wish to be more than who I am. Others see a completely different person. I am just me, take me leave me, but know I cant function if I am not me. And most of all, I have a tough enough time understanding life and myself, so if you need an explanation, you wouldn’t understand anyway …
The Bounce Back
Perspectives vs Truth, Hate vs Love, Anger vs Calm, Spite vs Kindness, Revenge or forgiveness? We ALL FAIL EVERY DAY
REJOICE and do not fret
Yet, some of us TRULY fail- fail to learn and grow and accept life
to see rather than to blind
to empathasise and see compassion, to temper the anger frustration and hurt, to understand and uplift and to give
Rather than to take
All negativity hurts and
creates pain and
through that pain
YOU choose to make YOU strong or weak
Some say “meditate”
“just be happy and in the light”
“always have a good attitude”
Others mix in religion, and so on….
Great Asperations, Truly they are.
if EVERY DAY was the BEST DAY EVER
no one, I mean NO ONE, would have a baseline.
We, unfortunately, are not programmed
to be happy ALL THE TIME!
And I feel if I shun REAL emotion, I shun LIFE
REAL LIFE, TRUE NOURISHMENT I feel arises
through connecting with people and LIVING
I’m tired of accommodating, tired of trying to change
to please others because
I LIKE ME
and if you don’t, no problem
JUST DON”T EXPECT ME
TO BE DIFFERENT
Maybe I fail, maybe I examine my choices, my perspective
If I’ve caused TRUE HARM, I’ll try to fix it
If I experience harm, I’ll HEAL
and if someone is trying to
throw hate, pain or sorrow my way
I’ll do my best to soothe it, walk in their shoes.
As I try not to run away, because I’d rather be alone when it is
CRAZY and then i feel CRAZY and need QUIET, need to decompress
AND NO ONE GETS THIS
But, you wouldn’t tell a person having an asthma attack-to breathe
A heart attack- be positive, calm down
A rise or fall in blood sugar- Ride it out
A stroke- ignore your symptoms
A massive cut- FOCUS ON NOT BLEEDING
So why, when it comes to OUR BRAINS, OUR CNS which controls
Should we dismiss emotional pain or flaws?
Same human, same body, a malfunction with an organ
Makes NO sense to me
I do my best to help others, show generosity, sacrifice, hope, love, faith, forgiveness, support, tears, empathy and because I do I AM NOT WEAK
Yet, so many embrace harshness, bullies and assholes
and call that (false ego)
makes no sense to me
and then I notice I become like them to survive
and I unravel….
as I feel so often, I DO NOT BELONG HERE
because it all feels backwards.
I don’t know what to do so I’m dishing a major rant,
on a day the haters are on a mission
train wrecks are everywhere, dodging boulders to no end…